Advice Archive

5April 23, 2009
When You Are Surprised To Find A Relationship Deal Breaker After Three Years Of Dating

Ashley writes in with a personal problem stemming from the Steve Ward/Vh1 mess: Hi Alessia, I’ve been following along with the Steve Ward fiasco (what a piece of work that…
0April 16, 2009
Getting In The Mood — At The Same Time Your Partner Is

So, if you read part one, you know that the problems with getting in the mood for sex with your partner — especially both of you being in the mood…
40April 6, 2009
Giving Steve Ward & VH1 Some Tough Love Of My Own

I’ve been watching VH1′s Tough Love for the past few weeks now and, despite his somewhat slower-than-I up-take on females and a need to nurse along a viewing audience, I…
0March 27, 2009
Dates Are For Learning

My daddy, the one who calls ‘eunuchs’, ‘tunics’, always said that dating was equal parts learning about your date and learning about yourself. Each & every date, each and every…
1March 17, 2009
Loved One Can’t Commit to Anything?

Got a loved one who can’t commit — to anything? We’re not just talking about the usual commitment resistant guy (or gal)… We’re talking about some seriously deep-rooted issues with…
2February 17, 2009
Of Labeling, Limiting & Running Your Fingers Down Some New Spines

Andi (of Outer Limits — a most fun blog), has an excellent post: lesbian fiction, or does this book make me look gay? (Who doesn’t get sucked into reading with…
0February 12, 2009
Could You Live With Elizabeth Hasselbeck?

Just a bunch of scrambled thoughts… Sarah Palin. I really just want to say those words because Elizabeth Hasselbeck says that all you have to do is say’ Sarah Palin’…
11February 5, 2009
Valentine’s Day Dating & Relationship Tips

Thirteen Thoughts About (& Some Gift Suggestions For) Valentine’s Day For The Single: 1 Do remember your friends! It’s still fun to send & receive Valentines — even if they…
1January 28, 2009
How To Get Her To Wear Lingerie

I received an email from Gary, who presumably didn’t have all his holiday wishes come true — and is working ahead for Valentine’s Day: I’m wondering what you think is…
3January 12, 2009
Drew Barrymore & I Agree

I normally don’t give a fig what celebrities have to say about dating — not only do they not live in the real world, but they are generally poor examples…
2January 7, 2009
If Your Husband Is Cheating; Get Your Fat Ass To The Gym

Offensive because it’s putting the blame on ‘you’ for his crap, but still… There’s something to this. If you’re overweight, you may not have ‘let yourself go’ in the way…
0January 3, 2009
Men & Their Delicate Dangles

If you follow me on Twitter (and you should; I’m told I’m a hoot), then you “heard” me mention that I had a fabulous email regarding my post on New…
0January 1, 2009
I Want To Change Your New Year’s Resolutions

So you’ve got this to-do list of things you’d like to change about yourself — but hold on there, miss! Before you start the scheming to match your dreaming, the…
0December 31, 2008
New Year, New You?

Ah, the New Year is about to dawn… The time of year when so many people look at themselves and, upon not liking what they see, come up with ridiculous…
4December 30, 2008
Ted’s Invited To A Threesome… How Will He RSVP?

A conversation with Ted, an old college friend of mine, over wine this past holiday weekend: Ted: So she asks me if I’d be interested in a threesome. Me: And…
1December 29, 2008
The Grass Is Always Greener When There’s No Snow

A friend of mine, Marta, was complaining that it was more difficult to “meet people” during the holidays — and by “meet people” she specifically stated that she meant, “to…
0December 23, 2008
Pulling Relationship Weight

Leigh Peele, a published author and expert on weight loss, has an intriguing article at the Examiner on the courtship of obesity: The process of mate selection for human beings…
2December 11, 2008
Shut-Up Cosmo: Date Rape Is Not The Victim’s Fault

In the latest issue of Bitch magazine (Fall ’08, Issue #41), a scathing article by Jennifer McDaniel, “Don’t Take Advice From Cosmopolitan, Part 877″, blasts Cosmo’s recent (June 2088) article…
3December 4, 2008
13 Dating & Relationship Tips De-Myth-tified

Thirteen Things About Dating & Relationships 1 Meeting people is hard. Come on people, unless you are a hermit and not on the internet, you meet people every single day….
1December 3, 2008
The Truth About Sexy Red Lips & Dating

I wasn’t going to answer this question right away, but seeing as 1) it’s holiday time where dressing more glamorous is de rigueur (or at least more possible), 2) that…